there are so many posts here about killing one's self. Please please please do not do so. There are so many people who love and care for you. Honestly it is hard for loved ones to admit that someone they love has a mental illness because it is something they cannot fix nor understand unless they have been in the situation themselves. If you are exhibiting signs of suicide I would go to the ER immediately the next time you think about killing yourself and tell them you are a suicide risk. In the meantime call your general practitioner and tell him/her exactly what you have told us. the doctor will want to start you on antidepressants immediately (mental note- those take time to work so if you don't see results immediately give it time), but before you let him prescribe you anything ask to be referred immediately to a psychiatrist. They are the only ones with the specialized training necessary to properly diagnose and treat your condition. ________________________ general practitioners are great, but they tend to prescribe meds that are popular during this time- not what would be best for you. that is why a psychiatrist is the best for antidepressants and counseling. “Suicide is not chosen; it happens when pain exceeds resources for coping with pain.” But there are people out there who can be with you in this horrible time, and will not judge you, or argue with you, or send you to a hospital, or try to talk you out of how badly you feel. They will simply care for you. Find one of them. Now. Use your 24 hours, or your week, and tell someone what’s going on with you. It is okay to ask for help. Try: Send an anonymous e-mail to The Samaritans Call 1-800-SUICIDE in the U.S. Teenagers, call Covenant House NineLine, 1-800-999-9999 Look in the front of your phone book for a crisis line Call a psychotherapist Carefully choose a friend or a minister or rabbi, someone who is likely to listen muffinabundant- you are a complete idiot. Antidepressants, properly prescribed, have helped MILLIONS of people including myself.